Songs About D

by Elizabeta Lāce

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about

Elizabeta's second record "Songs About D" is a contemplative journey of impressions, reflections on fateful instants, comprised in unbounded dimensions of space, light and shadows of a woman's voice and the grand piano. Documental work based on diary entries of dramatic events which may seem to re-happen constantly in the 21st century world facing changes and emancipation - a desperate act of gathering all bits of bravery, self-reclaim of aggression and personal power to face and accept, to search for hope in taking responsibility, own sovereignty. Starting in first steps with raw wounds and no promise of healing yet aspiration to become enough with just a wish - leading in dignitary burial of an inner victim. Elizabeta's artistic autograph ethics are based in traditions of existentialism, mythology and post-humanism, aesthetics - in decades of studying performing arts and composition, combined with therapy - processing into seem-like intuitive, subtle, hardened work, self called "Tough Love".
More on songs and behind-the-scenes available on www.my-diary.org/read/d/899436 , a diary project launched for an interdisciplinary statement, and with a victorious gesture of self-humour, album's artwork is inspired in sentiment of the dark music scene from the final decades of 20th century, sacrificing whits in order to reach the Initiation.

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released December 31, 2016

Elizabeta Lāce

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Elizabeta Lāce Latvia

Elizabeta Lāce is artist creating works (performances, audial compositions, interdisciplinaries) with current central themes such as research of spaces, artifacts, accuracy and significance of hystorical evidence in the circumstances of geo-political survival, individual’s aspirations to interconnect with causations in time and questions of free will. ... more

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Track Name: DWÄINA
... and I wonder ,,,
Who You are?
I wondered,
Who You really are.

You are...
Track Name: VITALINE
Her name was Life.
She chose death.

What do I know?
What have You done?

She had a life under her heart,

What have You done?
What did You know?



Her name is life
But She chooses death.

What did You know?
What did You do?

She carries life under her heart,

What do I know?
What have You done?



So deep in dark You’ll see at once that
Your life is not done to the end.
Unforgiven curse,
I hope You’ll find a way,
Free from all pain.



Her name was Life but She chose Death.
What do I know – what had You done,
She had a life under her heart,
What did You know?
What could I do ...
Track Name: KILLBURN
Brutality, why can’t You let me be? Why do You torture me?
Can’t find my way back home to me.
You poison me, control and fight with me, consume then throw me out,
Still keeping me in, You keep me in.
Invisibly possess virginity, decide what’s free to be,
I can’t go on – go on – go on...

Away, all I want is to disappear
Run to the forests, over the fields,
into the the Sea...

Brutality, why just don’t murder me? Why not more torture me? Still my heart’s beating, slowly - I still can breath. I’ll always stay my way.
Something won’t be betrayed,
got so much more beneath me...



I feel You, I hear You, I see You, I breath You,

But I don’t need You,
I love You...



Brutality, oh just don’t let me be. Just keep on torturing me,
won’t ever find my way outside.
Take over me, conquer and fight for me,
And never let me go
And screw me inside out, You’ll know...
Track Name: SUMMERS
I’ve been thinking will I ever feel with someone together?
I’ve been trying hard that this someone could be You.

But why was that all never right,
And do all between Us worth something,
But the seasons keep changing
And I think will never know.

***

I’ve been drowning in Me, in You, in Everything
to understand something as You said I don’t.
Cause I know that I love You -
That’s why I needed change.

But why was that all never right,
And do all between Us worth something,
And why can’t We once end it?
And I think We all know.
Track Name: FALL
We came in this world falling down from sky so high and nothing to gain or loose in this horrortime...But I want You to see all the beauty of roses and sunsets and oceans, and I want to be with You Forever and watch all the stars getting old. And I need You to feel all the love in my heart towards You my Dear. We both know that clock goes tick-tock and We all have our lesson that needs to be learn.

And I see myself getting older – and I get frightened by the time with all the things what I’ve seen and heard. We’re living in such a weird world where You always get what You deserve. Everyday I keep fighting with shoulders of the Dark, in my soul – for Me and for You, and so on... But I want You to see all the beauty of roses and sunsets and oceans, and I want to be with You Forever and watch all the stars getting old, and I need You to feel all the love in my heart towards You my Dear. We both know that the Clock goes Tick – Tock and We all have our lessons that need to be learn!!!

And I need You to see the Forest behind trees and River in a single teardrop.
And I want you to breath the Light from the sky and shine it into the dark.
And I want to be with You Forever and watch all the stars getting old,
- but We both know We’ll make it in the end,
Forever We will come to be as One.
Track Name: DOWN FIELDS
I’m going down to the Poetry fields
I go there alone, I’ll do it all the way

It’s been hurting for times and ages, so there’s not much left to loose again.
And this time I can’t promise Glory, cause You know I’m not holding back.

You’re the one still hesitating, putting blame mad at me...

And after all – what You want, what You want from me?
From me...


I’m burning ground from where those seeds grow.
And I’ll crush and smash until nothing’s left at all.


May Gabriel be my witness - there’s no limit to my rage and so beautifully contained unlimit love from Above...

Don’t look at me like You don’t know what You want after all...
What You want, from me.
Track Name: GRANDCHILD
I’m sitting here alone, it is what it is.
It is a Void.

I’m watching my heart as seasons go by.
I’ve tried – I’ve got inside.

And I see only You
I see only You, oh.


***

My head hurts, I know You won’t return, the Red* surprised, I did it by Myself.
It’s You not Him, still They not Me – please, don’t give Me away, don’t let Them* embrace Me...
You’ve sent Me out, threw Me in the Dark.
I’ve casted outside.

***
(You’ll find Me in the Forests, watch my tail in the Depths of Sea, stars whispering something...)
***

Now I beg PLEASE don’t pierce His eyes out/break His wings!
Did He loose His Faith...

***
(...Your pain terrifies Me, I could not lift it - but I’m bound.)

***
I’m sitting here in the dark, alone with my heart.
And I see what I see and I feel what I feel
I know something You wish I could deny.
I found You in the treetops, frost coated hills, I see your face above the Waters...
Stars scream out your name and I see only You, mm.
Track Name: MORTAL COMBAT
He pulls a little girl with his strong arms, down the tank, back in her father’s safe embrace. Her tiny hand wrapped around His thick fingers, trained to pull a trigger, grinded in my tombs... I see Him, I cry.

Got his boys across the pond growing alone, got his Wife fucked by a Neighbor, put his Mom on the list for Yellow letter*. He sees me and I cry.


-

He will give his LIFE for Me.

He is KILLING for Me.

Cause He loves to Kill,
and He wants to Die.

I love to sniff his gear and I just want to cry.


***

I loathe this Savior

and I love this Killer.


-

Goodbye, my Lover! Have a good good one...
Track Name: TAKE ME TO THE SEA
Take me to the Sea up above the shore
Where I can see far away.
Listen to my breath, I can here you there.
Your thoughts are bulb of Light.

As I asked I got all answers, no worries down here.
Where I can be just right now right here,
It’s all fine, it’s all right.



Ghost resilient, flow into my heart,
I long to see Your face.
It hurts to see Your busy Shadow in time I can not cripple in,
Sunset shines in dust.

I’ll stay who I am, I’ll stay where I stay!
Time will change everything - We won’t stay the same.
Lift Yesterday away,
Bring your Love into Another day.



Wherever are You, where You are...
Track Name: QUEEN D
Tell me what You’re doing now?
Can’t You see, my baby, life is now or never...
Why’d you, why did you do that for?
For Him it’s whatever, but for You it’s a life what running passes by,
Why to live this for?

It’s all what You’ve got, it’s all what You have!

Remember about the Pain.
Rise from ashes!

Here we are again,
Circle unbroken.
With His big cheeky eyes telling everyone lies.

You believe Him, I know You do.
I even wished to be like Him, so everybody’s fool.
But You’re the Rainbow, just remember that,
You’re the Queen of the Moon, of the Daylight...

She’s all that You’ve got, She’s all that You have!



He was Your Man for a day or two.
He lived in his own world.
He was a King.

I’ve been here before,
I know how it hurts.
You give yourself lies that You’re wrong in every kind.

I’ve been here before, but what do you think?
You know, who I am(?)...
Track Name: Guns&Neurosis
I know too much, seen things I wish I wouldn’t seen
Out of control,
Sky rise yet I only fall.

Somebody gets married,
someone gets Gun.
Somebody gets down,
someone get high.
Somebody shoots - some people get scared,

Some people get through,
Somebody dies.


I’ve talked too much, been mean,
my words ain’t always nice.

You find my voice annoying
still nobody ever could shut it right?

Then my silence scares, it still drives you nuts.
I couldn’t say how I feel,
don’t you know what you want??

Now that We all know I’m crazy...
not deducted just to showing off.

Somebody was Her, somebody was Him
Someone is You, someone is Me
Things what we do, things what we did -
it all comes from You, it all goes back to Me.


Sweet vanilla, lilac, gasoline
White pearls, black veil.
Crimson roses – I can not hold my breath,
She shouts me out, tells me I must leave!

Procession takes Us further,
Wooden cross, I read his name.
As He goes down, book is closed, put back in the shelve.


Communication stops, imposibility of content, no signals of encounters, caught out interference, no performance delivery, failure of shortage.

I’ve isolated this virus of me...
Absence of presence.




***
It’s all the things I’ve got to remember.
Track Name: RELEASE
They were my Sun, my Earth, my Oceans of fears.
I could not ever say no to it, taught me so much. Now I’m my own guide through the night. I’ve started to think without You.

Blue skies above me
- Forever!
The narrow Infinity, so here I go again...


Creator I’m blind and devastated by myself. I know I can bear it all as long as I’m with You.


They can be where they need, they must go where they want, I love You too, years will go by, probably there will never be time; I’ve hold Your hand and You’ve hold mine...
Your beauty makes me cry, We are a broken Mirror.
Your eyes reflect’s paradise.

It goes on, Love is Forever.
It’s never over, in this Silence I have to go!
Forever You’ll find me, I’ll hide in your Heart
Before
You will give it a try again.


The biggest act of Bravery would be just to look Me in the eyes. I didn’t want from You something what You could not give me, where do we go from here?
Now I have no fear.



When will I become a human?

When will my Soul come down again...



This is my Freedom, cold lone soil. A place I can go on – on with my pain.
Nobody can hurt me, it’s safe, nobody can reach me here.
Nobody wants what no one can give, and this is where I don’t need you.
Only thing what stays,

I love You.